Friday, 29 March 2013


A cosy feeling in my belly. Like eating freshly-made, warm apple crumble.
Soft shudder in back and ears.
Neck moves like a fond wave caressing rolling shoulders.
A wish to run and jump and love and laugh and cry and scream and dream.
Energy wakes up deep inside, simmering in my stomach.
Legs get up in soft motions.
Heart beating strong and round.
Hugging my loose shoulders with closed eyes.
Move my way across the room in delicate turns.
Arms swing open welcoming an imaginary mizzling summer rain.
The peaceful air smells like butterflies, allround a tender invisible breeze of beauty.
Endless love flowing out.

Thank you Zouk. You revive me over and over again.

Monday, 25 March 2013

A tree in the wind

Left: our neighbour's mango tree
Some time ago I was sitting on the roof of our house, my bubbly neighbour Clarinha, 4 years old, was sitting beside me. We were talking about anything and nothing, when I asked her:

"Você sabe que tipo de árvore é"
("Do you know what kind of tree it is")

pointing to the tree on the left. That time the mangoes weren't ripe yet so it wasn't as obvious as it is on the picture. She looked at the tree, looked at me with a surprised face and said:

"Bem, uma árvore no vento"
("Well, a tree in the wind")

Simple as that. It really hit me that moment. Here I was, trying to define and make sense of everything around me, she just said what she saw - what it was.

A tree in the wind.

Thursday, 21 March 2013



My little puppy Amie was very special. A very kind and playful dog. She loved everyone. The same moment that she put her oversized paws on the pavement of our street, she ran to greet anyone who was standing there and if they’d let her, she’d lick their feet or hands and climb in for a hug. She loved children and playing with them. Even when they fell over her and screamed and ran like a chaotic whole lot. She would play in the sand and run around forever, she lived her life almost as if she knew that it would be short. When she ran to get a ball we had thrown for her, she’d literally throw herself onto the ball and floor, she jumped onto sand hills, swam in the stormy see and climbed over little obstacles we had build for her, sometimes she would get bruises and cuts but did not care. She ran, jumped into the mud leaving her shiny coat stripy, even knowing she would have a cold shower afterwards and making us having a bath with her, she still knew she would get a towel drying lap hug afterwards and lived every second she had, she enjoyed every day up to the last minute and she lived the life like a pure happy spirit. With her whole energy of bundled up love and joy.

Every morning, she was there. Waiting patiently and jumped and her little tail went almost like a helicopter propeller. Throwing her love onto us the second we woke up until the minute we went to sleep. Even followed me to the bathroom door when I took a shower waiting patiently at the door with her deep, loving, true, patient brown eyes.

When she got sick, she seemed to feel guilty when we had to clean after her  vomit and diarrhea. She observed us cleaning, looking at me with sad eyes, letting her head hang down and she tried to hide. But I didn t let her believe that she had to take a distance from us. I talked to her and she returned, still sad, but almost immediately wanting to climb onto my lap. I had her with me until the last moment. Even if I had to have up to 5 showers a day. But she realized after a few days, that nothing would separate her from me. So she stopped hiding and waited patiently for me while I cleaned what needed to be cleaned and then looked at me, waiting for me to invite her to sit beside me or on my lap.

In her last days, she stayed within 1m distance of me. No matter what I did, if I cooked or cleaned, she was there. As I was with her. 24/7. And most of the time, when invited or called, immediately climbed on my lap, whether I was sitting on the sofa or on the hammock. A real hammock dog. That’s how she lived her life. Not caring about anything but life, love, action and living those three.

She inspired me to live the very moment until her last minute. I had barely slept 4h tonight, when I felt I had to get up and look after her to give her some water and try to get her eat some liquid food. She was there. Waiting. Looking at me with her faithful eyes. Trying to lift her tail to greet me, using all the force she had left. I felt sick inside, but tried to cheer her up until the last minute. We went to the living room and sat down for some cuddles. I gave her water with a syringe which she had even more difficulty to gulp than the days before. She walked around me with weak feet and pressed her body against my back. Then she stood on her weak feet, using all her tiny strength and force to lift her head up and she looked at me. One intense look full of love. Then she climbed onto my lap and laid her head on my knee to rest. While I was softly patting her back, a few seconds later she collapsed. Her body went limp. Blood streamed out. And she died. She was a fighter from the start. And she wanted to make me happy and show her deep love until her last breath.

I love her so much. She will be with me, whereever I go. Forever.

Those are the last pictures I took of her. On 14 March, one day before she fell ill.

Angel returned to heaven

Amie has returned to heaven.  

She had a virus. Saturday morning she vomited and had diarrhea for the first time. The days after it went worse. no medications and injections helped. She also vomited them. We gave her water and liquid medication with a syringe. But this morning. She looked at me. Climbed onto me and put her head on my knee. And collapsed. Blood. And died. I am broken.

Monday, 18 March 2013

What are men to rocks and mountains - Trip to Pride and Prejudice scenary Stanage Edge

Whenever I think of rocks and mountains, the sentence in the titel from a Pride and Prejudice scene comes to my mind. And I see it right in front of me, Lizzy (Keira Knightley) on the rocks of Stanage Edge (Peak District) and her walk back to the village.

I decided that I cannot wait any longer and must go to see and walk to this breath-taking place myself. So those are my plans for one weekend during my  Germany/UK tour in April/May:

A weekend trip to Hathersage (train from London St Pancras) from where I will walk and climb through the moor and beautiful landscape of the Peak District up the mountains and rocks of Stanage Edge. Cannot wait! *_*

Monday, 11 March 2013

Brazilian PERMANENCIA Visa - I am now an official (permanent) resident!

A bit less than a year ago, I handed in my permanencia papers, had the usual (check out dirty laundry and ask any just so inappropriate question) immigration officers visit and paid the most absurd fees one can imagine.

But yes, here I finally am with the official foreigner's identity - provisional paper-document obviously (still another few weeks/months until the plastic ID is ready. Excuse the black marker - but do not want to risk any identity theft..... But no worries - the most important parts are visible :D

Which are: Brazilian Logo. Documento. Identidade. Permanente. 

Plus my totally sweaty face (photo taken on the same day I handed in the final documentation and received the provisional ID) haha, it was another exhausting documents hunt, up and down the hills from the centre, bearing the queue in front of the city hall at 7am to get hold of one of the precious number slips and wait another 3h to get certified copies at the crowded city hall corridor aka only f***ing place where certified copies can be made plus passport photo shop and passing internet cafes to fill in online forms, print out some more and back to the policia federal at the airport.....

But I am now officially free to come and go when I want and need to. Sure, I shouldn t stay abroad for two years, but we do know that's no realistic option, Amie would be quite p***ed off ;) Which leaves me with the next inevitable step - I am OVERDUE for a EU visit! Family and friends - here I come!!!!!!!!!!!! *_*

Sardinha com Pirão e Arroz – Sardines with pirão mash and rice

Fish for lunch! =)

Today we prepared fresh sardines with garlic, tomato & sweet-pepper broth, aromatic rice and pirão mash (Pirão – mash made of sardine broth and manioc flour).

Wonderful that something so healthy is so utterly DELICIOUS *_*….

Friday, 8 March 2013

My current favourite song - Like Yesterday by Colbie Caillat

The lyrics to this song are just too sweet <3

"Like Yesterday"
I remember like yesterday I 
Carried a heart without hope
Had given up on mystery I 
Only saw mirrors and smoke 
Thought I was fine alone 
That’s just because I didn’t know 

I remember like yesterday
Lovin you seemed far away 
We were friends in different places 
Then love began leavin traces
Sitting with u on a crowded bus
It seemed like just the 2 of us
That night everything was changed 

Tuesday, 5 March 2013

Amie's first beach trip

Last Sunday, we went on our first beach trip with Amie. She is 11 weeks old now, received all necessary vacc. shots and is used to short walks and sprints, so we thought we'd introduce her to the huge beach sandpit and sea bathtub with its soft and wild waves.

We were really excited and proud when she actually managed to swim first try! Although she doesn't like having a bath at home, she quite enjoyed cruising through the sea water. YAY!

But the thing she probably enjoyed most was caving her way through the sand and creating comfy warm wholes to lie down after an exhilarating sprint up and down the low sandy hills.